The Firstborn

Last week I was reading two unrelated devotionals: The Disappearance of God by R. Albert Mohler and Eyes Wide Open by Jud Wilhite (I reviewed both last week). The focus of each book was completely different from the other, and yet in my reading I came across the same passage from Scripture in both in one night. When that happens, I pay attention because I suspect that God has a message for me. Really, what are the odds of me coming across the exact same passage in two so very different books on the same night? You are a chosen people. You are royal priests, God's very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God's own people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God's mercy. 1 Peter 2:9-10

I read through the verse a few times and wrote it in my journal. Then I made it personal: I am a chosen person. I am a royal priest, God's very own possession. As a result, I can show others the goodness of God, for he called me out of the darkness into his wonderful light. Once I had no identity; now I am God's own. Once I received no mercy; now I have received God's mercy. Even after multiple readings, I still wasn't sure what God wanted me to do with the verse, so I tucked it into the back of my mind in hopes of future revelation.

Last night, the Lord shed more light on the verse for me. I'm reading Neb Hayden's When the Good News Gets Even Better. It's a study of Jesus' life going through the Gospels chronologically and has an amazing amount of fascinating tidbits about Jewish life in the first century. The lesson last night was focused on my identity in God.

Who am I really? If you read my profile on various social sites, I'm a happily married mother of three, and when I'm introduced to someone, that tends to be my initial response. If the new acquaintance asks for more, I offer that I'm the Pastoral Care Coordinator at the local hospital, and I love my job. Dig a little deeper, and I'll talk about my blogging and book reviewing. Those are the identities I tend to use the most: wife of Jesse, mother of Doogie, Molly, and Mia, employee of Community Memorial Hospital, writer of Christy's Book Blog. After a few more minutes of talk, I may offer the fact that I want to be a published author. I've been working on my first novel for almost five years. Do any of those tell you who I really am? Do they tell you anything about who God wants me to be?

An exercise in Hayden's book gave me some new identities:

I am a friend of Jesus Christy John 15:15
I have been made complete through Christ. Colossians 2:10
I am holy for all time. Hebrews 10:14
I am loved by God and without fault in His eyes. Ephesians 1:4
I am totally forgiven. Colossians 2:13
I am precious in His sight. Isaiah 43:4
I am a faithful follower of Christ Jesus. Ephesians 1:1
I am a saint. 1 Corinthians 1:2, 2 Corinthians 1:1 and many more

So how do you think that would go over the next time I meet someone.
"Hi, I'm Christy, and I'm a saint. "
"Err... that's nice. So what do you do?"
"I'm a faithful follower of Christ Jesus."
"Jesus huh. How's that going?"
"I have been made complete through Him, and He's my friend."

Would you think I'm crazy? How fast would you be beating a retreat to the nearest exit? I don't think I could ever do that, mostly because it feels so unhumble, especially the saint part. But Wilhite has something to say about that: Here's a statement that may shock you: It doesn't matter if you feel like a saint or even act like a saint. As a follower of Jesus, you already are one. It is part of your new identity. Hayden says this: It's true that we were sinners before we met Jesus and we were also saved by grace but as a "new creation" we no longer can be defined by what we were even though we still commit sin. Why? Because sins are what you do, not who you are.Who you are is a saint who sometimes messes up.

I made myself write out the promises of who I am in my journal, because the act of writing makes things more real for me. If I write it, I remember it, and I never want to forget these beautiful truths. I love what Hayden said: Sins are what you do, not who you are. I'm going to work on redefining myself in the identity that the Lord has given me, rather than the ones that I've given myself or society would give me. I am a new creation and precious in His sight! Try saying them out loud to yourself and find the one that sticks in your throat; that's the one you need to hear the most!

The Firstborn by Conlan Brown is what appears to be the first in a series of gifted individuals trying to do God's will here on earth. Devin Bathurst is a member of the Domani, one of three groups who view the world in a unique way. The Domani can see the future, the Ora the present, and the Prima the past. Devin races against time to rescue a young woman who has been kidnapped. Once she's safe, he discovers that the woman, Hannah Rice, is the granddaughter of the patriarch of the Prima. The two of them are soon on their way to a meeting of the three sects who normally never intermingle, but threats from the outside are causing some of them to want an Overseer to be in charge of all three groups. Devin, Hannah, along with rogue Ora John Temple are pressed hard to stop several terrorist plots while trying to figure out who is their enemy and who is a friend. I had a hard time at first getting into this debut novel. There are a few places that would have been served by a bit more polish, but once the action started, I literally could not turn the pages fast enough! Brown provides a great deal of insight into the point of view of each of the three groups, and those perceptions transfer to reality as well. Those who are focused on the future tend not to worry as much about immediate needs. Present minded people tend to live for the moment without worrying about consequences, and those living in the past can become depressed and apathetic. The action is brutal and well-written. I could see it all playing out in front of me. The characters are interesting and definitely worth following into future entries in the series.

I took Molly and Mia to the beach today to meet Doogie and Bre. It was over 100 degrees with the heat index! I had brought Mia to the library first for story hour, but it was held outside, and she almost passed out from the heat, so we cut that short and headed for the water!

Don't forget to drop me an email to sign up to win a copy of The Vanishing Sculptor! You have until 10 pm on Thursday, June 25th.

The Disappearance of God & Eyes Wide Open

I've been giving a lot of thought to how God is working in my life lately, and Eyes Wide Open by Jud Wilhite (review below) really clarified things for me. In junior high, high school, and even in my early twenties, I can't count the amount of times I prayed to Jesus to come into my heart and take over my life. I'd read about salvation moments and how a person's entire life would change, feel clean, want to follow God's will, and be a better person. I remember lying in bed and just hating everything about my life. I hated that I wasn't a better person and that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't seem to be any better. I knew that having Jesus in my heart would make things better; I'd heard it enough in church to know it was true. I prayed asking Jesus to save me and pledging to turn my life over to Him. I figured I'd wake up in the morning and be a whole new person, but it never happened. I still woke up the same old Christy and couldn't decide if I wasn't good enough for Him to save or if He just didn't exist.

It wasn't until 30 that I did have my salvation experience, and I did feel completely clean and changed. The first person I called was my father, and he warned me that the feeling wouldn't stick. I would go back to feeling guilty and facing temptation. Dad was right, as usual, but this time something had changed: I had Jesus to help me fend off those feelings, and when I did give in to temptation, I knew just how to get rid of the guilt. When I prayed all those years ago, I wasn't asking God to come into my life and help me live differently, I wanted Him to take complete control of me making sure that I wouldn't make any more mistakes. I was so sick of making mistakes and disappointing people, I wanted to turn it all over to Him and not deal with it any more. It wasn't until I was willing to work with Him that He took me up on my offer to take up permanent residence in my heart.

Like Wilhite says in Eyes Wide Open, I wasn't willing to let God work on me. I wanted salvation to be a big, one time deal with immediate results. I thought it would ensure that I would never swear, lose my temper, gossip, feel hatred, etc. But God doesn't work that way, Wilhite compares it to restoring furniture. First you have to be stripped down before you can be built up, and it takes hard work and long hours. Today, five years after Jesus became my best friend, I am a much different person than I was, but I am still far from the person I want to be. I know that the creation of that person is a lifelong effort, and when it's finished, I won't be a perfect person here on earth, I'll be a perfect resident of Heaven. I figure I'll have an incredibly long life, because He has quite a bit to work out in my yet, but I've finally learned to start enjoying the journey.

The Disappearance of God by R. Albert Mohler Jr is a stark look at how the church has been transforming into the image of popular culture instead of the other way around. Mohler tackles some tough issues like the emerging church, discipline within the church, and moral relativism. The book has some terrific points, but it felt much like a college lecture. I wanted Mohler to start speaking in layman's terms and create more of a conversation than a lecture. If you can wade through the high language, you'll find some excellent arguments about how the church is failing its people and vice versa. I learned a great deal about the emergent church and how church discipline is supposed to work. I am concerned with how Mohler is addressing this topic however. I think that a lot of older members of the church will love this book and it will be preaching to the choir. However, the younger members of the church do want a more loving, compassionate church. Generations X and Y tend to communicate in a different way than previous generations, and while that doesn't excuse forgetting about the core of what Christianity is about: Christ's divinity and the Trinity, the church does need to find a new way to speak so those members will listen and want to be a part of it. Mohler's church seems to exclude them and want to discipline them right out the door.

Eyes Wide Open by Jud Wilhite is a beautiful look at just how much God loves each and every one of us. This book was such a joy to read. Wilhite uses Scripture after Scripture to show the loving nature of God and just how much He really wants a personal relationship with each of us. By reminding readers that they are members of a royal priesthood and God's own possession, he offers a wonderful gift that sometimes gets lost in the message of Christianity. Yes, we are sinful, but He loves us anyway, loves us huge, beyond anything our minds can imagine. He uses stories of people like Evil Kneivel and Johnny Cash to show what God's real love looks like, along with personal anecdotes. The true loving face of Jesus shows on each page and in every story, like the one about the former stripper who goes into strip clubs and pays girls for their time to talk to them and share the Gospel. Sometimes faith doesn't look like we expect it to, but we need to judge a tree by its fruit. I will be looking forward to more books by this author. This is a book to take to your heart and then pass on to a friend.

Today is your last day to sign up to win a copy of Never the Bride. You don't want to miss out on this fun romance, so send me an email before 10 pm tonight. I'll announce the winner here tomorrow.