Parting the Waters

Learning to let go and let God has been one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn as a Christian. I still struggle with it daily, but there are some situations where it's easier for me to surrender than others. Recently, we've had a great deal of upheaval and drama in our lives, so I've started a prayer journal. I have a regular journal where I write Scripture and quotes that strike my heart, prayers and praises, and things I learn on my faith journey. I started this new journal to remind myself to truly trust him. I'm reading a great book called When God & Grief Meet by Lynn Eib, and in my reading last night, Eib described two different ways we can look at trusting God in all situations. We can be resigned or surrendered. If we are resigned, it means that we aren't happy about it, but we didn't really have a choice. Surrender, however, is a choice, and one that I'm not very good at yet. In this new journal, I jot down just a few words about each prayer: Jesse's dr visit, Mia's cold, Howard's health, etc with the plan that as a prayer is answered I can mark it off with a date and maybe a note about how it came to pass. It's also a reminder when I open up the book to not worry about the prayers I have already noted in it. It's ok to assail Heaven with repeated prayers, but it's not okay for me to be stressing about them all the time.

In the last few months, I've had a few problems that were so big there was absolutely nothing I could do to improve them for the better. Sure I could have gone in fists aswinging and try to fight my way out, but I was so overwhelmed by it, it made more sense to pray to God and ask Him to do whatever was best for everyone involved. In every circumstance where I did that, He took care of the problem in an amazing way. On the other hand, small problems that should be less worrisome, give me more headaches, because I feel like I can do something about them and so I should. I'm hoping that as I continue to journal, I can learn to trust God with the small things as well as the big things, because He has more than proven Himself faithful.

Parting the Waters by Jeanne Damoff is a beautifully written story about how God used one family's tragedy for his glory. Jacob, the author's fifteen-year-old son, nearly drowns on a youth group outing and revives only after twenty minutes of CPR. Jacob suffered major brain damage from the lack of oxygen and doctors quickly tell the Damoffs that his brain is essentially dead and that it would be completely ethical for them to remove his feeding tube and allow him to die. Instead the Damoffs lean on their faith and community, and God comes through in amazing and miraculous ways. This is the kind of book that as you are reading it, you have to keep putting it down to tell everyone around you about the events within because they are too powerful not to share. Damoff is honest about her grief and anger about the loss of the Jacob who could have been, and her story is a testament to faith. It's a wonderful book that will bless everyone who reads it.

Howard was sitting up in a chair last night, and they are even giving him some thin broth to eat on his own. Apparently he had several strokes, so the movement on his right side is still limited, and he is a bit confused about time and place. I'll go see him again later this week.